As your senior’s caregiver, you’re facing her health issues head on. Other family members might be in denial, especially if you’re talking about something as serious as dementia. Here are some ideas for coping.
Remember That Denial Often Masks Other Feelings
For so many people, denial is a protective cover. It tends to mask other feelings, like fear and anxiety. If you can remember that in the moment, it can help you to respond more carefully to some of the reactions you may be getting from other family members about your senior’s care and her needs.
Stay Calm, Even if You’re Frustrated
When you’re frustrated you might find yourself reacting in ways that don’t make you feel great afterward. This usually happens because you’re right there in the trenches, being a caregiver, and you don’t feel heard by the other people who love your senior. This is a completely normal reaction, but it’s not going to serve you well with communicating with the folks who are still in denial.
Try Getting Everyone on the Same Page
You’ve already been trying to educate your senior’s family members, but you’re going to need to keep at it. If it’s at all possible, try to get everyone in the same room or at least on the same conference call. Sometimes when people hear the same message delivered the same way to everyone at once, they finally get the importance of what is being conveyed.
Let Them Work through Their Feelings
You’re asking your senior’s family members to give up their strongest coping mechanism, which is their denial of what’s going on. That means that they’re going to have to work through their feelings, especially if they weren’t consciously aware that they were afraid or worried or feeling some other way. This may take them some time and they may still not be of much help to you in the meantime.
Concentrate on Making Sure Your Senior Has What She Needs
Once you’ve done everything that you can do, your next best place to spend energy and time is on making sure your senior has what she needs. This may mean bringing in extra help to assist with all of the changes that are going on in your senior’s brain and body. Homecare providers have the experience to jump right in and help you and your senior to cope.
It can take some family members an awfully long time to come around and to understand what you need from them. You may not have time and energy to devote to them when your primary concern is your senior’s well-being.
If you or an aging loved one are considering Homecare Services in Newton MA, or anywhere in Eastern Massachusetts, please call the caring staff at CARE Resolutions – (508) 906-5572.
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